see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
I almost didn't recognize her with a shirt on.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
Randomize
