I smell stomach acid.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
