Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Other than a hickey from some random Canadian roller derby girl, I came out unscathed
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
There's a Japanese guy here dressed as a Viking who just screamed "wats up cocksluts" and kicked a guy in the face. come get me out of here.
Drugs and unwanted pregnancies are the only things that I'm good at. College comes in at a close third.
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