Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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