You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize
