Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
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Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
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You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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