how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
We were all singing so you said you were going to play a percussion instrument... the crackers.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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