I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Within the first 2 minutes of this morning, I found out the Lions lost on last play, and Scott Weiland died. I wont be in today.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
Randomize
