The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
"it" just moved
That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
What do you expect from her? Do you remember that creepy man she dated who saturated a pillowcase in his musky cologne and mailed it to her and she still slept with him.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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