pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
