absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I woke up with "To whom it may concern" sharpied on my dick
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
Why is the toilet broken? Why did I wake up naked in the shower, hugging a bath mat? WHY IS THE TOILET BROKEN?
Is it just clogged or something?
No! There are actual chunks of toilet on the floor.
Randomize
