Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I'm laying in the fetal position on the floor of my kitchen eating potato salad with my fingers. Please come over with some real food and keep me company.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
