I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Yeah just got a blowjob at busch stadium during the cardinals game childhood dream realized
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I feel like if tampons weren't meant to be microwaved, they'd have a warning on the box, so we should be okay...
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
i out mim tonsoeep
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