He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Right. He was like "I'll be here all night if I have to..." I was like "Well then, I'll have to call the cops..."
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
