I wanna passion pit in your ass
We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
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