problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
my god I love twenty year old dicks
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
Randomize
