oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize