we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
Randomize