The funny thing about my wife cheating on me is that the guy probably has genital warts now. Sweet.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
ttyl tear gas
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
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