What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
What would I even say at the wedding? "Sorry that I still wouldn't sleep with you after four years of you trying...but hopefully my sister here isn't that stubborn" and give him an awkward pat on the back?
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
