nut hugger
I can text with my tongue
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Woke up this morning with my period. Saw a commercial for the beginning of Shark Week. I see what you did there, Mother Nature. My pad's off to you.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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