some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
I'm trying to find a fanny pack so I can bring pizza on my run
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
there is puke in my bra ... again
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