She just used a chaser for red wine.
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
How do you get the "hangs out with drunk assholes" insurance
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
