i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
His constant posting of "inspirational" Taylor Swift quotes over the past 3 days has me a little worried. It's like, holy shit dude, you're almost 30.
Did you leave it the depths of Magic Mike's favorite banana hammock?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Then you guys just all showered together...?
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
