Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Randomize
