It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
So if I get kidnapped from my office and go missing for a few days does that count against my vacation days and do I still get paid?
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Randomize
