So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
SHE MASTURBATED TO THE THOUGHT OF ME HAVING AN ALL DUDE THREESOME WITH HER EX BOYFRIENDS.
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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