these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
Randomize
