I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
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There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
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Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum