Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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