escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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