I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
time to smoke my breakfast
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize