Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
Where is my rescue team. I keep hiding shit. And I'm trying to give out shots of olive oil
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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