i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
Never let a one night stand shower at your place. My razor, lotion, and brush disappeared. #girlcode
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Randomize
