i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
