Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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