thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
My hispanic family watching the world cup is getting too intense for me. a lit candle was just thrown at me because i walked by the tv.
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
