coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
I woke up on the dog bed, bottle of alcohol still in hand and my thong was hanging off the family portrait.... Yikes
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
