Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
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Strip Mario-Kart
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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