i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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