yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
only if we run a train.
done.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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