my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
How has he not realized you're pregnant?
Spanx.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
Bang-toberfest begins!!
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
He was passed out, face in the toilet, so I just pissed on his head. Serves him right
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