It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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