1:32a: I quit. signing up for eharmony. Don't judge
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
I want to tell everyone I've ever met about how he him picking me up and fucking me against the wall was the highlight of my life. Worst lesbian ever.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
