Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
How does one acquire holy water?
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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