Don't make out with my wife yet
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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