So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
