the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
Randomize
