Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
