So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
