Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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