New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
Randomize
